As I peeped out to make sure the Severn was flowing by as it should be today, as it does every day, I considered how much time I spend down on its banks. Counting days. Taking photos, writing, dreaming, watching the bore. And what I had seen come in on the tide as I watch it.

I was also considering how every public space is filling up with Christmas festivity and songs. The hard sell is arriving as sharply as the freezing frosts. And how I am selling my new book Severnside: An Artist’s View Of The River Severn as Christmas presents, taking me a bit out of my comfort zone.

The Severn has always provided a place for me to retreat to, to avoid the everyday hustle and bustle and looking at screens. I’m in a local choir (but having a break now while sorting out the book) and love singing songs about the River Severn. I am also acutely aware that in my book there is only ONE word that raised questions from proof readers. An angry word, a foul word, used to refer to the plastic that is constantly washed in on the tide. And, in my usual playful way, I began to write a song in my head. In all fairness, not writing a song, but changing the words of a familiar one we all know. So here it is:

The 12 Days of Severnside Song

On the 1st day at Severnside
The tide brought in for me
A branch from a very small tree

On the 2nd day at Severnside
The tide brought in for me
Two bouncy balls
And a branch from a very small tree

On the 3rd day at Severnside
The tide brought in for me
Three crab claws
Two bouncy balls
And a branch from a very small tree

On the 4th day at Severnside
The tide brought in for me
Four diving ducks
Three crab claws
Two bouncy balls
And a branch from a very small tree

On the 5th day at Severnside
The tide brought in for me
Five plastic bags!
Four diving ducks
Three crab claws
Two bouncy balls
And a branch from a very small tree

On the 6th day at Severnside
The tide brought in for me
Six surfers surfing
Five plastic bags
Four diving ducks
Three crab claws
Two bouncy balls
And a branch from a very small tree

On the 7th day at Severnside
The tide brought in for me
Seven dogs a-swimming
Six surfers surfing
Five plastic bags!
Four diving ducks
Three crab claws
Two bouncy balls
And a branch from a very small tree

On the 8th day at Severnside
The tide brought in for me
Eight sailors sailing
Seven dogs a swimming
Six surfers surfing
Five plastic bags!
Four diving ducks
Three crab claws
Two bouncy balls
And a branch from a very small tree

On the 9th day at Severnside
The tide brought in for me
Nine bottles bobbing
Eight sailors sailing
Seven dogs a swimming
Six surfers surfing
Five plastic bags!
Four diving ducks
Three crab claws
Two bouncy balls
And a branch from a very small tree

On the 10th day at Severnside
The tide brought in for me
Ten herons standing
Nine bottles bobbing
Eight sailors sailing
Seven dogs a swimming
Six surfers surfing
Five plastic bags!
Four diving ducks
Three crab claws
Two bouncy balls
And a branch from a very small tree

On the 11th day at Severnside
The tide brought in for me
Eleven elvers swimming
Ten herons standing
Nine bottles bobbing
Eight sailors sailing
Seven dogs a swimming
Six surfers surfing
Five plastic bags!
Four diving ducks
Three crab claws
Two bouncy balls
And a branch from a very small tree

On the 12th day at Severnside
The tide brought in for me
Twelve months of wonder
Eleven elvers swimming
Ten herons standing
Nine bottles bobbing
Eight sailors sailing
Seven dogs a swimming
Six surfers surfing
Five plastic bags!
Four diving ducks
Three crab claws
Two bouncy balls
And a branch from a very small tree